News & Reflections

In a blog post from Harvard Health, Faculty Editor Claire McCarthy, MD offers an interesting look at how shaming children can impact their lives. She explains the differences between criticizing and shaming: “Criticizing a child in public may be important, especially if they have been rude or hurtful to someone, or done something that could [...]

You may feel like you’ve spent a lifetime trying to understand how your narcissistic parent feels. You may have learned to tilt your world to track them as though they are the satellite and you need their signal to survive. When you feed their ideal self to their satisfaction, you might be rewarded with a [...]

Nicole Spector explains what self-awareness entails and how we can better cultivate it. Spector quotes psychologist and author John Duffy who says: “In effect, self-awareness is the recognition of one’s own emotional state at any given point in time…we are, far too often, wholly unaware of the emotional state we are currently in, and the [...]

“Manipulations come in a variety of packages; we often know in our hearts when we’re being played but might not pay attention to the voice within telling us to steer clear. While there are many authentically, genuinely nice people, the narcissist is the one who seems too good to be true.” Adapted from Narcissism: Surviving [...]

“With the narcissist parent, a real attachment to their child remains in question. This helps explain why the notion of a child’s launch and independence is so threatening. Launching, or letting go, evokes the narcissist’s deepest fears: abandonment, annihilation, and non-existence. Without the Other—the child—the narcissist may cease to exist.” Adapted from When Your Parent [...]

This article from the New York Times offers practical ways of dealing with difficult or toxic family members during the holidays. Harry Guinness lists some solutions: “How family members are doing, sports, pop culture and travel are all subjects where you can find commonalities with pretty much any relative. For example, even if you and [...]

In a post featured on Psychology Today, Sherry Gaba LCSW explains how growing up with a narcissistic parent impacts relationships later in life. Gaba writes: “Punishment, emotional isolation, and even threats of leaving the child are all common. At the same time, the narcissist is quick to spot any signs of independence or individuality…which is [...]

In an article on NBC News, Nicole Spector explains how diagnosable narcissism is much more than self-absorption or vanity. Spector explains common, toxic traits of narcissism and how to identify them. “…If you’re worried that you might be a narcissist, you probably are not one. Narcissists generally lack the kind of empathetic self-reflection that might [...]

The more I accept exactly what the situation is, and how the narcissist is—something that might be thought of as being “dedicated to reality”—the better off I am. Reality is in the present, not the past. There is a certain kind of mourning that goes with letting go of the illusion and seeing that the [...]

Scott Mautz’s article on INC. covers a helpful way to handle difficult conversations. Mautz cites Dr. Albert Bernstein who implores actively listening to the other person instead of planning your words in advance. He writes: Bernstein says it’s far more important to listen, reflect, and observe. The more you listen, the more likely it is [...]

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