The number of resentments individuals have with a narcissist typically correlates to how invested they are in their narcissist’s life. Often, this investment in the narcissist surpasses the interest in their own life.
Think of anger as an emotion that arises from a single incident. The incident will typically make us feel out of control, wounded, slighted, used, or taken advantage of―all things that breed profusely in the petri dish of narcissism. Resentment is what happens when you take anger and nurse it.
Ask yourself what you’re upset with today. Is it old or new? Is it anger or resentment? You have control over whether or not to let resentments go. Many people hold onto resentment because a part of them believes letting go of resentments means letting go of their power―the power to fix the relationship with the narcissist, or to teach the narcissist a lesson. But holding resentments eats up your personal power.
Know how to take back your power? Stop throwing energy at your resentment.
Making a decision to do nothing (aka letting go, letting it be, wait and see, etc) is actually making a decision to do something.