A recent New York Times column titled “A Former ‘Yes’ Addict Confronts The Pains Of Recovery” features an interesting excerpt from Steve Almond and Cheryl Strayed’s advice podcast, “Dear Sugars.” They discuss the importance of setting boundaries, saying “no” and answer a question from someone struggling with the emotions that have surfaced once they began saying “no” to toxic family members. Strayed responds:
“Even when you know you’ve done the right thing, it’s hard to not feel devastated. The negative consequence of your very healthy decision is that people you love shut you out. That hurts, but it’s incredibly common. When we say no, we’re setting a boundary, and people who have trouble with boundaries almost always have an adverse response when others assert their own. But please remember this: It’s far more painful to continue in relationships that have become toxic to us than it is to have them end because others refused to respect us…”
Read the column here which includes a link to the full podcast. The episode also features an enlightening conversation with Oprah Winfrey.